Regrettably, our society maintains a host of unrealistic assumptions and inappropriate expectations when it comes to the work of grief and the realities of mourning. Here are some myths to consider:

  1. Grief and mourning decline in a steadily decreasing fashion over time.
  2. All losses prompt the same type of mourning.
  3. Bereaved individuals need only express their feelings in order to resolve their mourning.
  4. Grief will affect the mourner psychologically but will not interfere in other ways.
  5. To be healthy after a death, the mourner must put that person out of mind.
  6. Intensity and length of mourning are a testimony to love for the deceased.
  7. When one mourns a death, one mourns only the loss of that person and nothing else.
  8. Losing someone to a sudden, unexpected death is the same as losing someone to an anticipated death.
  9. Mourning is over in a year.
  10. Time alone heals grief and mourning.

by David Fireman, LCSW, Adapted from Therese A. Rando