Grieving Children
Understanding and Supporting Grieving Children
Not long ago, psychologists did not accurately understand the way children grieve. In fact, in some circles it was thought that children did not grieve at all. Thankfully, we now know that in fact, children have their own unique patterns of coping with separation and loss, which are distinct and different from adult patterns. It is critical to account for children’s levels of cognitive and emotional development when supporting grieving children and helping them cope with their own grief. Paying close attention to what they understand about death will help them learn to tolerate their own and others’ grief reactions.
Furthermore, kids mimic their parents as they learn and develop in all ways and maybe in particular in how they cope with adversity. Therefore, it is essential that parents find a fitting language and belief system for the experience of loss in their own unique family system and teach their kids to regulate intense emotions and pay attention to maladaptive behaviors. The Center has worked with countless families to help them through the phases of grief and mourning in a way that is sensitive kids’ needs. Some of our staff are childhood development specialists and can tailor-make their approaches to help families with children who are living through loss.
Personal Grief Rituals by Paul M. Martin
Personal Grief Rituals presents a new model for how bereaved individuals can create unique expressions of mourning that are tailored to their psychological needs and grounded in memories and emotions specific to the relationship they lost. This book examines cultures...
On the Washington Post’s “How to Grieve During a Pandemic”
To witness is to protect and preserve experience from being denied out of existence. As mourners we go through phases of protest, not the least of which is the fight to not have our grief taken away from us. Back in September, 2020 when the total number estimated...
On the NYT’s “What if There’s No Such Thing as Closure?”
Bereavement thrusts us into a world of multiple swirling self states; feelings, thoughts, sensations that are unpredictable in their depth and range. In and through this bewildering painful process, we struggle to find a way to relinquish certain aspects of our...
On the NYT’s “Where Do the Dead Go in Our Imaginations?”
Even professionals in the mental health field are confused about loss and the realities of bereavement. We don’t simply relinquish our connection to the dead. Nor should we. Naturally, there is a struggle, but at long last a way to fight for some middle ground. ...
Grief Rituals, Part II
by David Fireman, LCSW The anguish of grief takes its own course and demands an unknown schedule. For a time we are dominated by its waves as they crash through us, sometimes in the most unexpected ways. Our reflex is to fortify and resist. It's actually only natural...
Talking to Your Kids About Your Terminal Illness
We’re sharing this article, entitled “Talking to Your Kids About Your Terminal Illness: A Guide for Parents,” by the ACLS Training Center, because it resonates with our philosophy of truth-telling in age appropriate ways. It is essential to absorb the point made...
Metaphors for Mourners
Grief counseling has a specific character in that it is essentially focused on assisting the griever in recognizing, reacting to, and integrating loss(es). However, while it is distinct in its nature and course, grief counseling often intersects with traditional...
CHICAGO TRIBUNE: Students return today for first time since teacher killed
When students return to class at the Chicago Waldorf School Wednesday, their first big test will be coping with the loss of a beloved teacher killed by a stray bullet just half a mile from where she had worked for the last 14 years. “As much as we might like to shield...
Communal Grief
We are born knowing how to grieve. As children, we cry naturally to feel better, to let go of our pain, to release the burdens of pent-up emotions. It helped us lessen the weight from our shoulders. Positive expressions of grief are helpful to us. It is the lack...